Resolving Interpersonal Conflict – Case Scenario

Okay! I can’t think of a real-life scenario that’s suitable enough for useful commenting, so I’m going to post a hypothetical one.

El is a very compassionate and benevolent person. Since young, he has always had affection for the poor. He would donate his lunch to a poor classmate, savings to a charitable cause and time to do community service work. This character of his followed him into adulthood. He is now married, has 3 young children and lives a simple life. He works as a teacher and continues his cheerful giving in a home for the aged. He volunteers his time on the weekends and gives a part of his salary to the home. His wife Anna is a full-time nurse.

Recently, Anna conceived her fourth child. She is contemplating giving up her full time job to take care of the children. She knows that without her source of income the family would be on a very tight budget. Therefore, she decided to bring the matter up to El and seek his opinion. Last night after putting the children to sleep, Anna broke the news of her pregnancy to El and her thoughts about becoming a full-time housewife. El was elated by the former news and gave his support regarding the latter. She was pleased that he was very understanding.

However, El also realized that they may not have enough income to support the family especially now that they have just bought a new HDB flat. As they talked through the matter, Anna suggested that El give up his volunteer work at the home and save the portion of his salary for household needs instead. El replied that he could not do that because the home was also running on less than minimal manpower and financial resources and could barely support itself. El suggested they tighten their budget, and sell the car they already owned instead.

Anna wasn’t too happy at this point because she felt that El wasn’t prioritizing his family right. She had had a bad day and without thinking, blurted out that El was always too caught up in all his ‘charitable’ works and didn’t spend enough time with the family. That made El incensed and he accused Anna of being selfish. A heated argument soon ensued.

Max, their eldest son, awoke at a noise and came over to his parents’ room to determine the commotion. Just when he entered, he saw his father slap his mother and storm out of the house. He started crying uncontrollably. El went to the home for the aged where he spent the night while Anna was left to try and console the crying Max.

Today is a Saturday morning and neither Anna nor El has to go to work. However, neither do they have the desire to see each other. El is lost and goes to seek the advice of one of the residents of the home who is known to be a wise gentleman. Anna calls up her best friend and tells her what happened.

Choose between being the wise gentleman or Anna’s best friend, how would you present your advice? Examine the feelings of each party and suggest a course of action for them.

Why is Effective Communication Important for Me?

A picture like that always invokes a good long laugh. The honestly hilarious mistakes that we see ever so often bring much joy to life! However, in a sense, I am also reminded how important good communication is. In the case above, a harmless mistake has occurred. However, more often than not, miscommunication does lead to negative effects such as confusion or anger in one or more parties.

My life experiences so far have vastly broadened my views on communication. One particular example that stands out was my time in National Service. I was vocationally trained as a counseling assistant. For 2 years, I had the opportunity to learn and hone the skills of an actual counselor, communicate with many different military personnel, my own bosses and peers; of all ages, backgrounds and personalities. I thoroughly enjoyed the professional and personal relationships that I developed in that period, which wouldn’t have been possible if I could not communicate properly.

I decided to take ES2007S because I knew there was still much more I could learn about professional communication. Certain things such as job interviews still scare me to death! I am also considering between a career in engineering or teaching, and certainly both require a good amount of effective communication tools to navigate the workplace.

I feel what I could benefit most from this course is learning how to communicate professionally in a workplace setting. For example, in the leadership positions I’ve taken in the past, I’ve always found it difficult to lay down rules and demands for fear of offending others, even though I knew work needed to be done. Yet I’ve seen good bosses make motivating their staff to work look so easy. This is one such skill I hope to be able to get a better understanding of.